Sunday, October 30, 2011

It turn out the same thing.

I may not be perfect. I may not be good enough for everybody. but, I will always be the best for someone who really deserves me. and that's you, darling. you're probably the someone who worth my tears, worth my laughter, worth my heart & love me as much as I love you. It's never too hard for me to sacrifice everything for you. I always know that what we want and what we're trying to escape, are sometimes the very same thing.

As long ago.

Falling in love with someone isn't always going to be easy. darling, you know. there's gonna be anger, tears & laughter. It's when we want to be together despite it all. that's when we truly love another. I'm sure of it. The things that we did in love to each other, we remember. and if we stay together, it's not because we forget, it's because we forgive. aren't we? I may give Pulse for pulse, breath for breath. speak low, lean low. As long ago, my love, how long ago. My love never end.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Remembering nor Forgetting.

Darling, for the future. remember me with smiles and laughs, for that's how I'll remember you. If you can only remember me with sadness and tears, then don't remember me at all. alright? I may not have given you much to remember but please do. don't forget me. Sometimes, it's might be hurt of thinking back, what we used to be. we're belong to each other. just in a blink of eyes, everything is gone this way. that's should be for us to survive by remembering but, sometimes we survive by forgetting. aren't we?

Wednesday, October 26, 2011


The rain may be falling hard outside, but your smile makes it all alright. I'm so glad that you're my friend. I know our friendship will never end. how one smile can make the sun rise and set. then, just a single memory of that one smile can thoroughly make a friendship complete. you always here, having the kindness to help that were given to me without thinking. lending a hand to a project, that would be the right timing for me to have someone to help on. you're giving more than I expect to receive and you've never counting favors. you listen to me and offering me your opinion when you think I need to. and that would be too much for me, dear. you're so dumb. but, anyways I like you to becoming my true friend.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

This is goodnight and not goodbye.

My friend, like the path of a star. you'll be everywhere I am. so do I. that lies beneath the colds in this camp uncertain keep my light in your eyes say good night not goodbye. Don't fear when your dream waking up was never what it seemed. I'll fight with you for the dream. Like a chill very deep like a promise meant to keep you are aught to be so just let your heart reach out to me. I'll remember camping days and friendship are true. I'll be right by your side say goodnight not goodbye.

Friday, October 21, 2011

hand in hand.

Darling, if you can look through my heart, you'll understand what I ever wanted. but, I'll never get. There's nothing I wants more than something I can't have. do you understand? There's no feeling more comforting and consoling than knowing you are right next to me. hand in hand, heartbeat to heartbeat, soul to soul. Wouldn't it be so hard, for you to fulfill my dream? I always comes off strong doesn't mean I didn't fall asleep crying. and even though I acts nothing's wrong, just because I'm really good at lying. I've wasted so many words on you.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

A thousand years.

I keep telling myself that I don't miss you and I don't have the feelings, I have for her. but, you've made me believe it. I love you. I should stop making the same mistakes. shouldn't I? I should have ignore your existence. I should have ignore all of your doing. to keep me satisfied for what I have. I hate you for loving me the way I want her to love me so. I hate you for making me felt, I mean the world to you. people do said, do not under estimate the power of hug, the care nor love someone have for you, it can ease your pain nor loneliness. I don't believe in it. till you came. I may not love you now nor future but, I'll love you in next thousand years.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

yours not mine.

I'm sick of crying, tired of trying, yet I'm still smiling but inside I'm dying. There it goes again. All I want to do is close my eyes and sleep, because the process of being broken is incredibly exhausting. you attempt your best to make my days fulfilling, but no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to connect to me. cause I'm taken. you've mean something to me. and you know, Sometimes the silence and lack of words being said between us had hurt more than anything you've ever did. you know, It takes too much effort to pretend not to care. I may not fall for you. but, you definitely a good friend to me. I'm broken cause I'm broken yours.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

It's hard.

Have you ever felt that you're losing someone's attention? losing the closeness that you once had. the moment, the closeness, the care & the attention just not given enough. I miss you.I knew you do. aren't you? Nowadays, it's hard to find a good person. It's hard to find someone to talk to. someone who'll just listen and not judging me. someone who can really made my day. someone knows my humor.someone like you. but, you leave. you did. I should have stop you from leaving. I didn't. just because, I knew that I meet someone who means a lot to me, only to find out in the end. we just never meant to be together. just so I know. I have to let go.Whenever you walked by, I just gonna pretend I'm alright!:) I'll live better on without you!:) I'll smile just to let everyone know that today, I'm a lot stronger than I was yesterday!:)I'll count the garden by the flowers, never by the leaves that fall. I'll count my life with smiles and not the tears that roll for you. the tears and pain from the past you made the present me.Since you've move on, so do I.


The wind is shaking the windows, and over my small room. the stars fills up the sky, shining brightly to many to count. the stars reassure tired me. they wipe away the many tears that are deep inside me. It wouldn't be hurt too much as you've did so. cause they hug me tight, pamper me & comfort me. I wish you do so. but, you never will. never been. thought I'm exhausted to the point where I can't walk. thought my tears blur my vision. I'll still smile in front of you, darling. even though our happy times might be short, I'll treasure it deep inside my heart. like those countless number of stars, forever. My dream is coming. though it is unusual that my one stars is bright. it's bright, even blinding. it comes down to my shoulder. telling me, stop being so sad. it holds my hands as it touches me. and gives me a warm hug.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

I'll remember you.

I'm not as strong as I may look. right now, I can slowly feel myself starting to let go. I'm alright. have faith, be confident and step forward. to face all difficulties. It's scary to think that one day all this eventually end. I don't want to lose. but, it's time for me to grow up. I realize. maybe some people just aren't meant to be in my life forever, maybe some people are just passing through. they came into my life to bring me something, a gift, an honor. a blessing, a duty, a lesson I need to learn, and that's why they're here. I'll be missing the old times when you've leave. the laughter, the silly jokes & you. are the best thing in this world. I'll remember you.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

I promise.

There are things that I don't want to happen but have to accept, things I don't want to know but have to learn, and people I can't live without, I'll lose my happiness but have to let go. You've taught me how to be a better leader. guide me how to face under all circumstance. and many more. But, time. here you go. Can miles truly separate us from being friend? being my good leader? I'm not ready to handle it by myself. I still need your guidance. aren't I'm ready to face it? I just don't understand. For in the end, I will conserve only what I have. I will love only what I understand. I will understand only what I've been taught. I always know that every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. I promise. I'll handle it well and make you proud!:) Thanks for everything!:) I just don't wish to say 'goodbye' but, I know. I have to.

Monday, October 10, 2011

I would do anything.

I keep thinking times will never change, keep thinking things will always be the same. but, sometimes, things just happen beyond our control. People changed. so do feeling.There are just so many things I'm not sure of in life. but with all certain at this every minute, all I ever know is. I miss you. the old you. If only sorrow could build a staircase, or tears could show the way. I would climb my way to heaven. and bring the old you back home again. I would do anything just to bring you back to me. Because if I got you back , I would get back the friend that I once knew!:) I believe in myself. I believe I could bring you back. don't tell me. I'm just a dreamer. I dream my life away. I'm just a dreamer, who dreams of better days. I lived in the reality. and I met you in reality. It isn't fantasy for me to fill, it's reality!:) dear, you'll be the 'you' again.

Sunday, October 9, 2011


It's good being strong. but, it sucks when people know that I'm strong. some of them, take the opportunity to hurt me. and some people thinks it's alright to hurt me. darling, sometimes. the slightest words you spoke. have all gone to my minds. light on my heart, light on feet. light in your eyes I can't even speak. do you even know, how much you make me weak? I'm a lightweight. be careful for what words were spoke. cause once, it's hurt me. with every word I'm blown away. you're in my control of my heart. I may be strong. within you, I'm easy to fall. easy to break. with every move my whole world shakes. so, darling. make a promise. you're always be in reach. just in case I need. you there when I call. I wish you could. you've been a better place for me to fall.

Someone like you.

Sometimes I lay in bed at night, and think about the things that could happen between us. who I am? what I'll be? when you're gone. Sometimes my heart just need some time to accept what my minds already knew. In future, the moments kill me. the moment, that show us without any relationship. It do hurt me. I wanted to do much more for you, love so much more in you. but. I'm scared of taking risk hurting myself further. I may not control the moments that happen to me, but. I could decide to reduced them. come on, I should be happy. I've got everything I've ever wanted. everything I've ever asked for, so why do I feel like this? darling, I'll find someone like you, when you're gone. just so, I'll feel that I'm been loved by you once more.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

As I travel on,

'As I travel on, love's what I remember.' Mistake's what people remember. Moment's what we remember. People do say I'm different now. maybe it's because I've learnt how to protect myself from being used. learnt from being hurt. learnt how to live better. growing up within days. so, it's eventually the new 'me'. you know, I've been giving you my all, and even more than that. that's why I'm hanging on to you. and I'm hanging onto you. hoping that someday, you'll give me yours. but, you never will. never been. do you know, I don't care how much, how many time I've spent for you. I've never been regret of all this. but, seeing you without putting on any effort on it. it just making a bigger hole in my heart.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

That's what happiness are.

I just want them to know. that I've gave my all. I've did my best. brought your happiness in this world a little better. just because, I'm here to love you, darling. The happiness of life I brought in your life nor mine. is made up of minute fractions. the little nor sooner. unforgotten charities of a kiss on your birthday. a smile that could made my day better. a heart that felt compliment. the countless infinitesimals of pleasurable and genial feeling.the fight between you and me. just brought us closer. understanding each other more deeply. needs nor feelings. that's what happiness are.